Are you happy for you or someone else? Are you happy alone? Do you need other people to make you feel happy? Are you fulfilled, in life, in your career, in your relationships, in your investments? Are you aware of what happiness looks like for you? What is your happiest moment and does it involve other people, the birth of a child, a new pay increase, a new car etc.?

Happiness is not in materialisms – it’s within you but, the minute you give your “happiness key” to someone else for them to hold – you transfer power. You’re happiness should not rest in the success of your relationships or your marriage or in your family’s cohesiveness. The “happiness key” is yours to hold, you can’t just hand it off like your passing around the macaroni and cheese at Thanksgiving dinner. 

When you’re unhappy, it typically is a result of circumstances that were out of your control or circumstances that you feel like were in your control and you lost it. How long do you stay unhappy? Is it a day? A month? A year? A lifetime? It’s up to you. It’s not up to your kids, or your annual salary or your luxury items – it’s all about you. 

However, when you allow your happiness to be dependent upon other people and their happiness – you’ve lost the power. There’s power in happiness and in joy, but when you decide that, that happiness gets to be controlled by someone else – you’ve lost the battle. Misery loves company and if you give your “happiness key” to someone dead set on being miserable, how will you ever find joy? How will you know what solo-happiness feels like? 

Other people can make you happy but, they also can make you sad, angry and miserable. When you control your happiness, others can’t easily penetrate your bubble. Stop giving people the keys to your happiness when it’s time for to change the locks! Stop looking to them to confirm or deny your happiness. You are worthy of a happy, joyful, experience-filled and positive life, but part of that is determined by who you let in, by who you give access to. 

Be wise with who you give access to and remember that the “happiness key” belongs with self, forever and always. 

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