One more time for those in the back.
How many red flags do you need before you abort-mission? Think of a number based on your previous relationships, datingships and situationships. If it’s a number between one and one, you’re golden and you can stop reading here. Thanks for stopping by though.
However, if you thought of a number greater than one – keep reading. Let’s define a “Red Flag.”
Red Flag Definition(s):
1. A nonnegotiable character flaw.
2. A conspicuous, glaring sign that indicates some level of deception, dishonesty or disrespect in a relationship, personal or otherwise, that signals a need to sever that connection.
3. God’s attempt to pull you out of the fire before you get burnt.
In my opinion, because red flags fall into the aforementioned definitions, it should only take one for you to depart the situation but, we all know that’s generally not the case. Previously, for me it took about 19 or so red flags before I decided to leave what was no longer serving me. You read that right – 19! And typically, just because they didn’t check flag number 20 as well, I would continue to entertain them based on a score of 19 out of 20, which seems like a stellar grade but of course, we know it’s not!
Why? Why did it take so many red flags in the past? In truth, I was naive enough to believe I could turn red flags into yellow or purple flags but I never did – not once. What I consider a red flag might not be a red flag to you but regardless it will fit under one or more of those definitions and for that reason alone you need to abort-mission.
We wait and allow our feelings and emotions to get involved but, it’s much harder to leave then. You also start to become a little colorblind the more you fall for a person and what once beamed as a red flag now shimmers like a pink one because you’ve overlooked it, you’ve minimized it, you’ve made it a small thing – when it’s truly colossal.
Don’t ignore the red flags.
In most cases, the red flags are there in the beginning, address them and if change happens – great, but if not, don’t stay because you hope that they will eventually change – they might but they probably won’t. You can’t get your time back – remember that!
You got this!
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