5 Things That Could Ruin a First Date

There are myriad reasons why a date could go horribly wrong or cinematically right. Let’s talk about it.

  1. Attire

    Dress like you’re going on a first date. Don’t be too casual. Showing up to a first date in hoodies, clearly worn sneakers, wrinkled clothing etc. is not acceptable, in my opinion, of course. However, if the first date is a basketball game or baseball game etc., the above attire could pass but again, put your best self forward because you don’t get a second chance at a first impression.

  2. Preparation / Planning

    Plan your first date. It should not be an impromptu, go with the flow, we’ll-see-where-the-night-takes-us kind of vibe. Show that you’ve taken the time out to put some thought into the night. Ask about food allergies or the person’s interests etc. to gauge what might be considered a stellar date for that person. It shouldn’t feel like you two are just ”linking-up.” It should feel like a real date because the first one sets the tone.

  3. Conversation

    Pick appropriate topics and be sure to keep a healthy talk to listen ratio.

    One more time for those in the back.

    Pick appropriate topics and be sure to keep a healthy talk to listen ratio.

    You don’t want to talk too much and you don’t want to talk too little. Keep a balance, ask about their goals, career, aspirations, favorite shows, where they’ve traveled to etc. Don’t jump right into asking questions about exes, religion and intimate details like their sex life etc. Even asking someone, ”Why are you single,” can be a trigger, just know that they are single and you can dig into the particulars at a later date.

  4. Mannerisms

    For my men, open the car door, walk on the outside of the street, open the restaurant door, pull out her chair, let her order her food first etc. – be a gentleman. Trust me, it’s highly appreciated. Compliment her look for the night, her fragrance, her jewelry etc.

    For my women, compliment his attire or his fragrance. Be polite and courteous. If you are wearing a dress or skirt, be sure to sit with your legs closed. Be attentive and grateful – don’t forget to say thank you, it goes a long way.

  5. High Expectations

    In regard to expectations, it’s best not to have any. Why? Because disappointment stems from expectation. The less you expect, the less likely you are to be disappointed. If it goes well – great – if not – next!

First dates can be scary but they are inevitable, if you’re actually dating instead of Netflixing-and-chilling, that is. Require dates. Require respect and act accordingly. A first date can tell you a lot about a person and save you tons of time in the long run – remember that.

You got this!


If you found this article helpful, insightful or just plain old necessary, please share and repost – it’s free and I’d gladly appreciate it. Thank you in advance.

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