The Power of Disappearance

Every other day I see a thread on Twitter about disappearing for three or six months to watch how your life changes. I thought it was mostly bullshit but au contraire.

I wonder if you are supposed to announce your disappearance or discuss it in anyway. Does that go against the rules? Does that defeat the purpose? In my opinion, it doesn’t. You can document and detail your disappearance especially if it’s therapeutic for you, as it is for me.

I guess it depends on how you define disappearing. For me disappearing is simply limiting access. If you haven’t seen me, touched me, talked to me etc. then I have effectively disappeared. I can still tweet or go out on occasion, if I so choose, but as I approach, almost a solid month into my disappearance, I must say it’s rather peaceful. My days are planned yet thoughtless. I smile more. I laugh at my own laugh. I’ve tried to relinquish my obsession with success and just allow myself to do what comes naturally to me.

Here are a couple of steps to aid in your successful disappearance, if you choose to do so.

Step 1: Less access.
This means less social media posting, less conversation, less events, less interaction with those who you deem unworthy of being apart of this journey you are embarking upon. This moment of incubation does not require others, only take those with you who deserve to be present during this enlightening time in your life.

Step 2: Release the social media chokehold.
Social media has made us all too accessible. People feel as if they have a right to peer into our daily lives through stories, reels and daily tweets. It’s so invasive and my idols are not readily accessible so neither am I – now. It’s going to be an arduous task because social media is a daily part of your life and now you need to make it essentially nonexistent or at least be sure to rid your phone of the social media apps that you have an unhealthy relationship with. You can do this, start today – don’t procrastinate.

Step 3: Meditate, daily.
You are going to spend a lot of time alone, make your mind a healthy place to be. Your thoughts will control the success of this process, this self-induced isolation. You need good thoughts. I use the Insight Timer app for my guided mediations, it’s free – thank me later.

Step 4: Read for 60 minutes or more a day.
This one’s a tall order for some of you, especially those who readily state, “I don’t like to read,” my rebuttal is always the following: “You just haven’t found your author.” You don’t have to read only business books or books on philosophy. It can be for fun or for education, be sure to have a healthy mix of both.

Step 5: Decrease your circle.
This is another controversial option. You don’t need 50 friends. If you happen to be one of the rarities of the world that happens to have 50 solid friends, congratulations. However, in most cases, you need about three to five good friends. You are welcome to an unlimited number of acquaintances and passer-by’s but that’s about all you need. You don’t have to agree with or complete this step but if you feel the need to, start cutting off the people that don’t deserve access to the next level of you and do it now, rip it off like a band-aid, no warning – just do it. Remember, the people that haven’t been good to you don’t deserve an exit interview.

One more time for those in the back.

The people that haven’t been good to you don’t deserve an exit interview.

Step 6: Get to know thy self.
All of this will be for nothing if you don’t leave with a better understanding of you, who you were then, who you are now and who you will be. This self-education is essential to the success of this process. Don’t step away just to lose more of yourself. You will spend the rest of your life with you, make sure you know who you are.

Complete these six steps, in no particular order and enjoy your disappearance. By the time you’re done “disappearing,” you’re going to wonder if you ever need to reappear in any grand gesture – the reappearance is optional as well. Enjoy.

If you found this article helpful, insightful or just plain old necessary, please share and repost – it’s free and I’d gladly appreciate it. Thank you in advance.

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